Insomniac nights / Slapelose nagte

Insomnia.... 00h45 am Monday, 27 April 2009

Difficulty falling asleep (initiating sleep) or maintaining sleep. Most adults suffer from insomnia at some time or another. Stress most commonly triggers short-term insomnia. Adress your stress and thereby address your insomnia problem, but I am not stressed... I just cannot seem to fall asleep and if I fall asleep, I cannot stay asleep. Listening to my loved one's slight snoring next to me in bed, just aggrevates the intense need and urgency to also fall asleep, to also take deep breaths and dream of wonderful places.

I also suffer from sleep apnea, that is: if and when I fall asleep... but that is a total different subject that I will tackle later on, for now, I shall concentrate on insomnia. In short sleep apnea is when one stops breathing in your sleep and wakes up due to the lack of air... gasping and coughing... not pleasant at all.

Coping with insomnia ---- hmmm, easiest, but possibly not best way to deal with it: sleeping pills. Benzo's. My greatest problem with insomnia is that I eat when I wake up. I eat whatever I can find, but mostly breakfast cereal, usually Coco Pops. As a matter of fact, that is what I am going to do now! And of course, the result is weight gain... and I can directly contribute it to my nightly wakefulness and need to eat when I am not asleep at night!

There are so many websites giving advice on how to fall asleep and what to do: from benzo's to cognitive behavior therapy and hypnosis... I will not go there. I am telling you what you can do now that you are already awake...

I say: if possible, do not try to fall asleep immediately. Be relaxed, but do not even think of sleep. Enjoy being awake, especially if it is in the early hours of the morning... do not stress about the fact that you have to get up the next day and go to work... that will only result in you not being able to sleep at all!

Maybe you need to be awake when others are asleep, maybe there is something that your body and mind want to tell you that you are not hearing in the day hours. NOW is the time to LISTEN!

My advice starts of with: RELAX and LISTEN
- If it is possible, listen to music in a language that you do not understand, or listen to classical music, preferably barock.
- Relax while you listen to it, take deep even breaths
- Now ask yourself: Is there something I need to know?
- Have a pen and paper ready or start a "LISTEN-JOURNAL"
- Write down EVERYTHING that you are thinking....

Write until it just flows from your sub-conscious. Do not stop yourself if you think what you are writing is nonsense, the idea is not to pass judgement on your free writing, or flowing thoughts, just let it be...

After you have written it down, you may feel tired or you may feel even more awake, it does not matter - there may be an important message for you...
Now, read what you have written and let it be, do not make corrections, do not THINK of what you have written, just read it with an "empty mind".

Your mind may feel empty, you may feel overly stimulated, it all depends on WHERE your psyche is at the moment. Most importantly, you did not lie awake and thought of problems or other shit. You got up and DID something meaningful.

Now, if you really need to fall asleep, because (like me) you have to get up for work within a few hours... you can do some relaxation exercises. But this only works if you can "set" your mind to be focussed and to be creative in visualizing certain things. You can go on a magic carpet ride like I explained in one of my posts and allow the carpet to take you to "droomland" (Dreamland) or you can do the following:
Lie on your back, take deep even breaths, listen to your own breathing...
feel warmth flowing through your body and veins
tell yourself three times: my right foot and leg are warm and heavy, I can feel it sink into the bed
do the same with your right hand and arm
now to it with your left hand side...
end this exercise with: my whole body feels heavy and is sinking into the bed, i feel sleepy, i feel tired...
Repeat the exeecise if needs be.

I hope you will be able to cope with your insomnia as I am trying my best make positive use of the times when my mind and body are so awake and maybe trying to tell me something...